Monday, 11 March 2013 @06:58
Ranting Post.
Am i the weird one or what? I'm sleeping so early and way earlier than other people at my age. I miss out the fun, miss the out the crazy times and also miss out of small little details of my partner's life. I feel so weird.
I see my friends clubbing every night, having fun outside yet I dont have the desire to go out to club. The desire to sleep late. A habit to sleep early, Is it a good habit or bad. I am so confused now. People always say it's good to sleep early. But why do we miss out so much when we sleep early? Why am i just like that?
If it's a good habit, why do i feel like I am only the one in the world who sleeps early? Oh save me from my brains and my thoughts. Sometimes I can't even convince myself why these things just happen. Situation that happens, why am i always so awkward with new people. Am i stepping out of my comfort zone? Or the problem is with me yet again? I fail in so much stuff. I always though i was good in handling people and stuff but it seems that the best thing i can ever handle now is just my computer.
I feel lost. Lost. What do i do to make myself out of this mess and this confusion i have? How can i make myself more secured? How do i get it off my head and find peace within. How do i make sure my partner will always be happy with me and will never ever want to leave me?
I PRAISE GOD. I praise you Jesus, that even though I'm going through these few weeks of confusion and lost. I am just going to ignore all my circumstances and praise you Jesus. I praise you Jesus for you have saved me. You have saved me. You crown me with the glory of righteousness and favour. I will forever lift my hands up to you. I will forever bow at your name because you are just so lovely.
You give to me peace, peace abundantly. You will make me a somebody out of nothing. Though i always feel I am a nothing, but i shall not even think about it anymore. You will raise me up like how you raise Moses. You will use my hands and my mind to do things. I am small Jesus, I am so weak. You put me on your shoulder and carry me across the sands, across this vast sands. Praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord! Jesus cover me. Jesus you love me and let this love, change everything within myself. Let your grace explode in my heart and in my brain. Even my thoughts, shall be your thoughts. Your mercy and grace is everything I need.
Praise the Lord! that you saved me. that you pick me up and lift me up. Jesus, how you will ever take notice and pay attention to me? Yet you did the exact same, you look down on earth and you saw me. You see me, and came down to die for me.
Oh Jesus I am so underserving of your love. Yet you love me. Yet... You love me so deeply. Jesus, Thank you.
Shalom. And your peace shall be within.